God, my God, where exactly have You been?
When I took the blame
We laid in ruins trying to quote your phrase
We're yelling, "Someone's got the answers,
but I'd rather think there's nothing to be found!!"
If you knew I was dying would it change you?
~"I Can Barely Breathe" by The Manchester Orchestra
I've been thinking a lot about the 35W bridge collapsing since yesterday, specifically how it fits in with my faith and what I believe. Of course, I've had plenty of opportunity to think about how disasters fit into my faith before, but because I'm selfish, and none of them ever affected me personally, I never gave it a whole lot of thought. Now, however, I wonder why God... I don't even know how to finish this sentence, because I don't know if God allows these things to happen or causes these things to happen... or is even further removed than that. Is he so far removed from disasters that we can't even say he allowed them to happen? Saying he allowed them to happen implies that he had the opportunity to step in or considered stepping in or something (of course, I think he always has the opportunity, and I don't know that he has to consider anything, but going down that route would take far too long), but what if he just sat idly by and let the world sort of take care of itself? I mean, I know he cares about us and loves us, but does that necessarily mean that he has a hand in the way the world itself works? But then, if he does love us and care about us, how could he sit idly by while things like this happen? Or worse, how could he actively choose not to participate in preventing the collapse of the bridge, or at the very least saving those who were present while the bridge collapsed? Worse still, what if he caused it to happen? If God is in control, does that mean he forced the bridge to collapse? But what would be the benefit in that? I don't think that a loving God would cause the bridge to fall, so that leaves us with him allowing it to happen or apathetically sitting by while it did happen. And while both of those are terrible thoughts, still it doesn't seem right that God would give us everything and keep us safe all the time. I can't explain why I believe that, but deep down, I do. If God kept us all safe all the time, it seems to me that we really wouldn't need heaven, and then what would be the point of him creating earth and putting us on it? And I don't think God could just allow the world to take care of itself, while he sat by and did nothing, because he loves us... so then he could've intervened and chose not to for some reason that I don't think any of us will be able to figure out. And yet that seems like such a terrible thought, that God could decide not to help us out when he was fully capable... I don't know.
There's a whispering in my ear,
Soft but getting stronger,
Telling me the only purpose of my being here
Is to stay a bit longer.
~"Four Word Letter (pt. 2)" by mewithoutYou
And yet... I very easily could've been on that bridge, along with a friend of mine. We were going to a concert, and I left 15 minutes later than I wanted to. To make a long story short, we ended up on the bridge running parallel to the point at which 35W collapsed, somewhere between 10 and 15 minutes after it happened. Had we left at my originally intended time, there's a chance I might not be here writing this right now. I'm sure many of you will chalk this up to coincidence, and I am strongly tempted to do the same. However, and this may be simply because I was there and can't look at things objectively, I feel that God may have had some hand in this. There were a handful of circumstances that occurred last night that not only prevented us from being on the bridge when it collapsed, but also kept us from getting caught in the massive group of cars that was caught on the bridge next to where it collapsed. We were on our way to see The Manchester Orchestra, and once we were there and the band started playing, I definitely felt something that I think was God's presence. I'm sure I will be thinking about this a lot for some time, because over the past couple weeks I've been trying to figure out how much direct influence God... allows himself, I guess... in the lives of individuals and in the world as a whole. I will probably never know the answer, but it's going to be in my thoughts even more now than it was before.
A disaster's a disaster no matter what Christian language you drag it through
~"Wolves At Night" by The Manchester Orchestra
We laid in ruins trying to quote your phrase
We're yelling, "Someone's got the answers,
but I'd rather think there's nothing to be found!!"
If you knew I was dying would it change you?
~"I Can Barely Breathe" by The Manchester Orchestra
I've been thinking a lot about the 35W bridge collapsing since yesterday, specifically how it fits in with my faith and what I believe. Of course, I've had plenty of opportunity to think about how disasters fit into my faith before, but because I'm selfish, and none of them ever affected me personally, I never gave it a whole lot of thought. Now, however, I wonder why God... I don't even know how to finish this sentence, because I don't know if God allows these things to happen or causes these things to happen... or is even further removed than that. Is he so far removed from disasters that we can't even say he allowed them to happen? Saying he allowed them to happen implies that he had the opportunity to step in or considered stepping in or something (of course, I think he always has the opportunity, and I don't know that he has to consider anything, but going down that route would take far too long), but what if he just sat idly by and let the world sort of take care of itself? I mean, I know he cares about us and loves us, but does that necessarily mean that he has a hand in the way the world itself works? But then, if he does love us and care about us, how could he sit idly by while things like this happen? Or worse, how could he actively choose not to participate in preventing the collapse of the bridge, or at the very least saving those who were present while the bridge collapsed? Worse still, what if he caused it to happen? If God is in control, does that mean he forced the bridge to collapse? But what would be the benefit in that? I don't think that a loving God would cause the bridge to fall, so that leaves us with him allowing it to happen or apathetically sitting by while it did happen. And while both of those are terrible thoughts, still it doesn't seem right that God would give us everything and keep us safe all the time. I can't explain why I believe that, but deep down, I do. If God kept us all safe all the time, it seems to me that we really wouldn't need heaven, and then what would be the point of him creating earth and putting us on it? And I don't think God could just allow the world to take care of itself, while he sat by and did nothing, because he loves us... so then he could've intervened and chose not to for some reason that I don't think any of us will be able to figure out. And yet that seems like such a terrible thought, that God could decide not to help us out when he was fully capable... I don't know.
There's a whispering in my ear,
Soft but getting stronger,
Telling me the only purpose of my being here
Is to stay a bit longer.
~"Four Word Letter (pt. 2)" by mewithoutYou
And yet... I very easily could've been on that bridge, along with a friend of mine. We were going to a concert, and I left 15 minutes later than I wanted to. To make a long story short, we ended up on the bridge running parallel to the point at which 35W collapsed, somewhere between 10 and 15 minutes after it happened. Had we left at my originally intended time, there's a chance I might not be here writing this right now. I'm sure many of you will chalk this up to coincidence, and I am strongly tempted to do the same. However, and this may be simply because I was there and can't look at things objectively, I feel that God may have had some hand in this. There were a handful of circumstances that occurred last night that not only prevented us from being on the bridge when it collapsed, but also kept us from getting caught in the massive group of cars that was caught on the bridge next to where it collapsed. We were on our way to see The Manchester Orchestra, and once we were there and the band started playing, I definitely felt something that I think was God's presence. I'm sure I will be thinking about this a lot for some time, because over the past couple weeks I've been trying to figure out how much direct influence God... allows himself, I guess... in the lives of individuals and in the world as a whole. I will probably never know the answer, but it's going to be in my thoughts even more now than it was before.
A disaster's a disaster no matter what Christian language you drag it through
~"Wolves At Night" by The Manchester Orchestra
posted by Ben at 10:18 PM
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